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Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Yuck.

1 Not too happy about having to feel vulnerable all over again - but - this is how I will hold myself accountable.  Anti depressants (which I am off of now) have made a mess of me.  I think in their honest efforts to help us feel  better, prescriptions are given by well intentioned doctors.

8 Now, I've done a fair share of CBT (cognitive behavior therapy) and counseling to deal with highly traumatic things I have lived through - but it's like my body was reprogrammed after trauma incidents three years apart - to be chunkier than I would really like to be.

1 There is safety in weight... I am less likely to become a victim of a crime again.  This is too hard.  You can't do it.  (this is what I hear in my subconscious)

.6 I'm trying to scream back, YES I CAN!  If I can make it through three days, I'll get there.  With life feeling rather upside down, I am sure this will be interesting to commit to.  But - hey, I'm starting somewhere.

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